Is this really what our society is becoming? I had to ask myself the question when I came across this photo on my Facebook feed today. As I read, I could feel my face getting red. My heart just broke for the mother who had to open this piece of trash, and my temper flared at the thought of someone being so nasty and full of hate. This letter, so cowardly addressed with a made up signature instead of a real name, simply makes me sick. I can just see the letter's author, tiptoeing onto this mom's front porch, stashing the note, and running away like the coward she is, before anyone could see her.
I have a pretty good sized social media following, so I do want to address the coward who wrote that, on the off chance she sees this. But, I won't waste too much space, as she just isn't worth it. To her I say this: You need some serious emotional, and possibly mental, help if you can harbor so much hate that you feel the need or desire to attack a child with a diminished mental capacity or his family. Please seek help so that you can stop spreading the blatantly apparent emotional disease that's eating you alive from the inside.
But that's not really the reason I wanted to address this. Most of you who will read this will do so because you adore my sweet child who has a very physically evident disability. I seriously doubt that anyone who thinks the way the author of that letter does will take the time to open my blog and read it. But you guys are the ones I really wanted to share with.
When I asked myself the question "Is this really what our society is becoming" after reading this letter, I was disheartened. But immediately I began thinking of all the times that I have been attacked because of Christian's disability, and how quickly so many people came to my defense, and I remembered the force and the passion with which you have stood up for me and my family. I also thought about the 100,000+ followers Christian has, and how you celebrate every tiny achievement and every huge milestone that Christian accomplished, right along beside me, as if he was a member of your very own family. I thought of the gifts he has received and the friends we have gotten the privilege to met over the last few years. And in less time than it took to read that nasty letter, I answered my own question.
And the answer is a resounding "NO!" This is NOT what our society is becoming. This is NOT representative of the majority of our population. I believe most people would agree, that letter, that mindset, and that attitude possessed by that person are NOT okay. In fact, it's down right repulsive, sick, and straight from hell. And I think many of you would agree with me when I say that I question the mental capacity of anyone who would or could find it within themselves to author and deliver such a vile piece of garbage to another human being, let alone even think it.
I take pride in the fact that people come to me with questions about disabilities stuff. I love when people ask me questions. Some of my favorites have to be "How can I teach my children to accept people who have disabilities?" and "What is a non-offensive way to approach someone who is differently abled?" Okay, so I paraphrased there, but you get the idea. When people ask me questions like that, not only do I enjoy sharing my opinions and insights into the subject matter, but it gives me hope that there are people out there who genuinely care, who would rather wrap in love, the mama and child that were the subject of this letter, then to ever cause them any heartache.
My hope is that that letter is shared all over social media, partly because I hope that this, and a LOT of other messages of disgust, get back around to the author. But I also hope that as we share that image, we can all rally together in agreement that things like that are NOT okay, and that we can let our voices be heard in saying out loud "That is not acceptable." And hopefully one day, letters like that won't be written.
I've said this before and I will end with it because it bears repeating. In some societies, those with special needs are revered so much that people will bow down when they enter a room. It is believed that they are put on the earth not to learn like the rest of us, but to teach. Oh that WE could be such a society!!!!!!!!!!
Follow up: This letter is now making the news, and is causing outrage across the country, as it should! Read this story about the letter here: http://www.citynews.ca/2013/08/18/family-in-shock-after-hate-letter-targets-teen-with-autism/
When I asked myself the question "Is this really what our society is becoming" after reading this letter, I was disheartened. But immediately I began thinking of all the times that I have been attacked because of Christian's disability, and how quickly so many people came to my defense, and I remembered the force and the passion with which you have stood up for me and my family. I also thought about the 100,000+ followers Christian has, and how you celebrate every tiny achievement and every huge milestone that Christian accomplished, right along beside me, as if he was a member of your very own family. I thought of the gifts he has received and the friends we have gotten the privilege to met over the last few years. And in less time than it took to read that nasty letter, I answered my own question.
And the answer is a resounding "NO!" This is NOT what our society is becoming. This is NOT representative of the majority of our population. I believe most people would agree, that letter, that mindset, and that attitude possessed by that person are NOT okay. In fact, it's down right repulsive, sick, and straight from hell. And I think many of you would agree with me when I say that I question the mental capacity of anyone who would or could find it within themselves to author and deliver such a vile piece of garbage to another human being, let alone even think it.
I take pride in the fact that people come to me with questions about disabilities stuff. I love when people ask me questions. Some of my favorites have to be "How can I teach my children to accept people who have disabilities?" and "What is a non-offensive way to approach someone who is differently abled?" Okay, so I paraphrased there, but you get the idea. When people ask me questions like that, not only do I enjoy sharing my opinions and insights into the subject matter, but it gives me hope that there are people out there who genuinely care, who would rather wrap in love, the mama and child that were the subject of this letter, then to ever cause them any heartache.
My hope is that that letter is shared all over social media, partly because I hope that this, and a LOT of other messages of disgust, get back around to the author. But I also hope that as we share that image, we can all rally together in agreement that things like that are NOT okay, and that we can let our voices be heard in saying out loud "That is not acceptable." And hopefully one day, letters like that won't be written.
I've said this before and I will end with it because it bears repeating. In some societies, those with special needs are revered so much that people will bow down when they enter a room. It is believed that they are put on the earth not to learn like the rest of us, but to teach. Oh that WE could be such a society!!!!!!!!!!
Follow up: This letter is now making the news, and is causing outrage across the country, as it should! Read this story about the letter here: http://www.citynews.ca/2013/08/18/family-in-shock-after-hate-letter-targets-teen-with-autism/
This letter is just sick people know days are just sick.I think he is just precious
ReplyDeleteTake no notice Lacey .... she was so 'brave' to type this letter but a huge coward NOT to sign her name.
ReplyDeletePeople like her piss me off!! And you Lacey ... you rock girl!!! You have a lovely, lovey family!!
Hanny Koroh (from the Netherlands - Europe)
This person who wrote this letter was NOT brave. She is the BIGGEST coward and needs to seek mental health care for her instability. If she wrote this to Lacey and her family what will she do when she sees Christian or any of the family members face to face? Lacey turn this letter in to the proper authorities and keep this just in case she does something stupid.
DeleteJennifer, please re-read the post and Hanny's reply. For one thing this was not placed on Lacey's front yard she saw this on her news feed and thank goodness this was not directed at Christian. News feed means it came across her facebook news feed and that it was someone else who posted it.
DeleteHanny was not saying the person was brave. She had brave in quotation marks meaning the person was the polar opposite of brave. She then said the person was a huge coward.
I've seen a great many people not really read her post on facebook as well as here who were confused about the letter. It was posted by another mom who received this letter from a neighbor.
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DeleteI am absolutely disgusted by this. How dare that woman make another mother feel that way? Euthanize the child?? Oh.My.Gosh! What a sick individual, she is the one who needs the help. I am literally shaking with anger!! Make no bones about it, this woman is the worst kind of coward. And not a particularly good human being. How are we supposed to try and eradicate prejudice on this planet with people like this bringing more bigoted opinions to the plate and teaching their kids to hate in turn?? I really hope this woman opens her eyes and heart to all the beauty these kids possess, the kind of beauty many of us lack. I'll be praying for her.
DeleteI remember when "neighbors" helped each other in a time of need, help watch each others kids, keep an eye out, and so much more good things... Not trash talk your kid! Thus person is sick euthanize a poor, sweet child, who mind you, did not ask to be born that way and has done no harm! Its not his our his parents fault! What a cruel person with no life and no heart to sit and make this awful letter. Poor kid!
DeleteThis person was not even able to sign her name because she knows that she is wrong and she is not prepared to deal with the consequences. I know I don't have to tell you to ignore it and dismiss it, because you know that her words have no merit. Having said that, it is still hard to get those statements out of your mind, even though you know you should. Do not think about what she said, but pray that God will open her eyes and her mind, because she is blind, very blind. I don't understand how someone that is a mother could write something so horrible and then be such a coward. You have to realize that the words she wrote, she knows are not acceptable or she would have signed her name. It is not our place to judge her, oh but how I would like to, it is our place to pray for the blindness she has for the life that God has trusted you to raise. The life that has already in 2 years has shown so many people God's love, God's unconditional love. You have shown us everyday, how to love, as Jesus did, unconditionally. You have loved Christian from long before he was born, when you knew he wouldn't be like other children. He would be far more special, and able to reach all over the world to show us what love is really about. The woman that wrote the letter, is blind to God's love and rich blessings, and blind to your goodness and unending love to Christian and our Lord. I pray that she will understand someday, before she embarrasses her children with her selfish, mean and hateful ways. She must have a horrible life and I feel sorry for her.
DeleteMuch love to you all,
Kathleen Garrett Jutte
I am sorry but this is no real mother here. This is a cruel person pretending to be a mother. A real mother loves her kids unconditionally. If they are sick or handicapped she does whatever it takes to make her child happy healthy and whole. She does exactly what you are doing. Not this woman. She is no mother. I feel sorry for her kids if anything happens to them and they end up not being 'normal'. No one would take care of them. Not a mother who writes a letter like this.
DeleteThank you for your voice and sharing your perspective.
ReplyDeletethis is so beautiful lacey!!!! to he'll with her and the high horse she riad in on...
ReplyDeleteShould be very ashamed of herself. Hope she regrets writing the letter for the rest of her life. She doesn't deserve to have children herself.
ReplyDeleteThis is nothing but pure evil. So sorry YOU have to live in a neighborhood with this kind of hate.
ReplyDeleteWhoops, sorry. I thought this was to you. Thank God it isn't, but still...for that woman to say that about any child is disgraceful.
DeleteThis actually occurred in Toronto. The mother of the boy (who is 13) has severe MS and his grandmother watches him for her. (the letter was left at the grandmothers home).
DeleteThe mother and grandmother need to seek a "restraining order" or "exparte". To protect themselves from further violence. They would need only one. The person who wrote this sounds very capable of violence. No reason to take chances. Send a clear response by getting a restraining order. I cannot see a judge denying one based on that letter. the city may even bring charges against the letter writer on their own.
DeleteOh. My. Word !
ReplyDeleteHow dare that awful, mean spirited, cold hearted woman say those kinds of things to that mother of a precious soul put here by God Himself. I would not want to be her when she faces the judgement seat of God. And even if you don't believe that there is going to BE a judgment, what a sad life she must have here in the "right now", to be so cruel and unkind !! My worst fear is for her children being raised by such an individual...what must they be learning from her ??
that pissed mother is a coward!! she is had no respect to called you guys names... she is doing very wrong.. ur boys are very a precious
ReplyDeleteThere's always a reason why things happens but at the end of the day you are making your child happy
ReplyDeleteThis letter broke my heart I can't imagine what that mother is going through.I am praying for Christian and the rest of your sweet family. :)
ReplyDeleteim disgusted by that letter! who on earth does she (if it is a she) think she is, if everyone in her neighbourhood felt that way (like she thinks they do) they should have the decentcy to approach the childs parents in a calm manner , then they will be able to talk and maybe understand the situation. Every child has the given right to play in and on there property , things like narrow.minded gutless people like this person ( she aint normal) only do letters like this because they think there above all others!" a word to this person who wrote the horrid letter " you spineless ignorant coward " sign and address it next time then see where you stand . Sorry lacey things lile this.make me v cross x
ReplyDeleteI don't remember how I came across your family I think it was Facebook. I just would like you to know how much of a good feeling I get seeing Christian being brought up by two great parents. I watched the video of him playing with his toys and laughing reminded me so much of my son, brought the biggest smile to my face. That child is a credit to you's and you's to him. If only this place had more people half as great as your family. I made a donation and hope to do so in the future. Keep your chins up and heads held high. You have beautiful children and again a great family. Always in my thoughts and prayers. Wishing you all the best in the future. Barry x
ReplyDeleteAs I.mentioned on.facebook.this person is very disturbed and I so wish it didn't affect us all the way it has. He is a gorgeous happy loved boy. My heart goes out to everyone who has been hurt by this awful letter xxxx
ReplyDeleteThe fact that this woman has children breaks my heart. If she is presenting this much hatred toward another child and mother what kind of morals is she installing in her own children?! I love that you,Lacey, can use your platform to spread the love and faith for families that have children with special needs. They are called "special" for a reason.
ReplyDeleteJenn
this broke my heart. i couldnt imagine being the mother of the child this was about, what she went threw at that time reading this ignorant letter. its people like her that is spreading the idea that it is "okay" to bully someone based on their appearance. its sickening. just because someone is a special needs person DOES NOT mean they are any less of a person. they still have feelings and a heart. just because you may not know it, hear it or it may be difficult for them to express it, they still have a voice.
ReplyDeleteI HAVE SHARED THIS LETTER LACY,AND I AM ABSOLUTELY FUMING THAT SOMEONE COULD SEND A LETTER LIKE THAT,ITS DISGRACEFUL,YOUR CHILDREN ARE BEAUTIFUL.
ReplyDeleteTHE PERSON WHO WROTE THIS IS A COWARD AND SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF THEMSELF. AND YOU LACY? CARRY ON LOVING AND CARING FOR YOUR BEAUTIFUL KIDS,SENDING YOU BEST WISHES XXX
I will post this here as well as on Facebook (which is where I saw this initially) Lord God Almighty, lover of all, I ask Your gracious blessings upon this situation. Continue to bless Christian and his family even as You pour out blessings of forgiveness upon the author of that letter. Bless the author with understanding and compassion and an ability to see Christian through eyes of love. Bless the author's children that they might learn compassion and love of those who are other than they are by Christian's presence in their neighborhood. Bless us all Lord that we will always respond to those like the author with Your love, compassion, mercy, grace, and truth. In the name of Jesus Christ I pray. Amen.
ReplyDeleteLacey I'm so sorry that this letter was written. I came across your facebook page awhile back and have loved getting to know you and Christian and what you've been able to teach others. I think its great that you are ok with people asking questions, and you are very open and honest. Keep your chin held up high. We're all praying for you.
ReplyDeleteLove an Oregonian
The woman that wrote that letter is seriously deranged - to pick on an innocent child! Christian is a gift from God and so full of joy! i love seeing his pictures on here. Lacey you are a wonderful mother with 2 beautiful children . Keep up the good work>
ReplyDeleteLacey, I have been following your story only for a short while. I applaud you for being a loving mother. Christian is blessed. That hate letter is nothing more than a show of complete ignorance and lack of compassion and empathy. Do not let that upset you. Your strength of character and love will always shine through the mundane and mindless ranting. Give Christian the opportunity to learn music. I am mentoring a young woman born blind. She is the most incredible musician and her heart is full of love for her family and friends. She inspires me every day. Play music for Christian, give him pots and pans to hit. You will be amazed at how quickly he will learn rhythms. Best wishes to you and your family from Australia.
ReplyDeleteWhen I read this letter that this cowardly woman secretly delivered to you, I was absolutely disgusted!!! I feel sorry for her children because she is obviously not going to teach them to be loving,patient, compassionate and accepting of other's that are not "Normal" Christian is so very lucky to have such a wonderful Mother! People that are filled with judgement, critisism, and hatred towards something that isn't in the realm of the norm are the ones that have a problem! God placed Christian in your loving arms knowing that you were the perfect match for him, he will learn to be a loving, compassionate person with nothing to be ashamed of, to go for his dreams and let nothing get in his way, those that judge, are just fearful of something that is different, I know, I used to be one of those people. Through life's challenges, trials and tribulations I have gained knowledge, grown as a person and gained much compassion. I only wish that I would be the wonderful person that you are Lacey!!! Many blessings to you, Christian and your family! Don't give that letter a second thought, let's hope that one day this woman will wake up and realize the error of her ways before it's to late and she passes on her negativity to her children.
ReplyDeletesorry great job take care of your son
ReplyDeletePersonally I think this woman is a Devil. No one talks about an innocent child like this. She speaks like others agree with her, but doubt it very much. She reminds me of someone who feels she is better then others and believes only people that believe the same way should share her neighborhood. One day she will have to answer to this. God gave Christian to you for a reason, because you would love him the way he is and hold him as precious. He's a loving gift of God and walks this world because God wants him here. He has opened many hearts and minds. You and your husband are special people.
ReplyDeleteIf she so big and bad why didn't she identify herself? She better be glad my family don't live in your neighborhood! We would find out who she is and she would be writing you an apology letter and reading it to you face to face!! Now for Christian side of me, I will pray for her. Asking God to deal with her so that she recognizes why she said & did what she did!!.
ReplyDeleteLacey,
ReplyDeleteIt is apparent that you have understood the real message to a person who is quite deranged. Your maturity, as a young mother whom you are, astounds me. You have acted and behaved with such grace, to a person; as it has been stated above, a coward.
Do yourself a favor, as it appears you already have, don't be bitter, just better. And, with GOD'S Grace you are doing so.
Although I will admit, my heart does ache for you, because as you said, Christian has become a part of so many people's lives, who truly adore him. And the audacity, plus the energy it took to write such a vile letter, such as this, truly shows that this person does not understand what the word love really means. Love is unconditional, and will do everything in its power to seek and bring out the goodness of others. It does not know the word hate, for love only wants to help all it comes in contact with.
Again, I am truly sorry you had to bear the pain of that letter, sweet Lacey. But always remember, you have a network of people out there who love you, Christian and your family dearly. Keep the Faith, and do not allow people who are toxic, to rob you of your joys in this life.
Many Blessings and love always-Jodi Segal
4 Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; 5 does not behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; 6 does not rejoice in iniquity, but rejoices in the truth; 7 bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.......I Corinthians 13:4-7 <3
Lacey and precious Christian,
ReplyDeleteIt is to bad that God allows women or anyone with her disability to live with normal people. I have been following your family for about 1 year now and have enjoyed watching Christian grow and explore new things and love his new baby brother. This thing that wrote the letter is more blind then Christian, and deserves nothing but sympathy for her mental affliction and hopefully someone will put her in her rightful place ( Down below). I feel with all of my heart that she will pay for her thoughts and deeds when she stands before God and his judgement. I also feel that she will get her just deserts even before that day as it is said what goes around, comes around and usually in SPADES. You remind me so much of my little sister, who was told by numerous doctors that she could never have a child but God has a way of changing things and 10 years after she was married she delivered a beautiful little boy, When he was 6 months old he was given the MMR's shots and shortly afterwards, he had a severe allergic reaction to them and within then next few weeks it became obvious that something with Alex was not quite right, my sister took him to the doctor and through testing that Alex was border line autistic. He is now 12 years old and stands 6'2" and 175 lbs. It is my thinking that God new she wanted a baby and also knew that of all people she could understand and take the special care of her son. So anyone that thinks like the sub-human that wrote that letter, has no write or reason to live. Evil begets evil. Please take care of your beautiful family and I look forward to hearing more how you all are doing.
Best Wishes
Teri
I myself am physically disabled and have a happy normal healthy 10 year old son, who I was told I should give up for adoption, yeah not happening. People like this need a serious reality check!
ReplyDeleteI have a son with autism. Even though I never got letter like that, when he was small I got looks from some people that seemed to say something of that sort. God Bless You, Lacey, for calling them out.
ReplyDeleteI have come to adore Christian more every day. And you my dear will be forever in my heart. I look at this world differently, better, with more sensitivity and love. And for that, I thank you for allowing all of us into your life. Lots of love and prayers from iowa.
ReplyDeleteLacey, Christian is very blessed to have you for his mother. I never comment on things like this but I just want you to know that you are a true mother, an angel to Christian and God wanted you to have him because he knew you would love him and care for him just like any other child. This world would be a much better place with more mothers like you. Christian will grow to be a man that will always love and respect his mother. Thank you, Lacey, for being you.
ReplyDeleteI completely regret that Lacey have to read such things, do not understand the truth as can be so very ugly people, and can be expressed as, no heart, Lacey has much work ahead last thing you need is to be contaminated with messages like that of the letter, I understand everything so well and suffers Lacey passes, because I have a special angel home, the last thing you need is this, sometimes you feel so alone that some people support helps.
ReplyDeleteThis hurts my heart :(
ReplyDeleteI doubt a woman wrote this. I'm betting it was a troubled mess of a teenaged boy with some serious anger issues and need for therapy and/or incarceration. I can't think of any woman I have ever known that could write such a hate-filled diatribe. God Bless everyone who is dealing with the challenges of a disabled child.
ReplyDeleteYour reply is sexist and hateful. There is absolutely no evidence pointing in direction of either sex - this letter could as well have been made up, intended to go viral - which, indeed, it has.
DeleteI suggest you get professional help if you stance is that all evil in the world must necessarily come from males.
All I can say is the author of this garbage is either sick or extremely cunning - but most certainly a coward.
Whoever wrote this is very troubled. Lacey, as Christians we need to pray for this person, just as hard as we can. Please God, do not let her hurt anyone else with her vile words. How precious our children are, ALL our children.
ReplyDeleteI am going to play Devil's advocate here. While the woman or whomever wrote this seems way too extreme, are there any points in her letter that are true?
ReplyDeleteIs there screaming? That might be disturbing for other young children to hear. It would also alarm people in the neighborhood. All of mom's intentions are wonderful, but are they effecting an entire neighborhood?
The women who wrote the letter is crass and unsympathetic? Could it have been said in a more kinder way? Absolutely! There are ignorant people out there without handicaps. Is there other options for care, yes.
I do have a couple of questions:
DeleteWhere is the husband in all of this? It seems that the wife has to deal with a very difficult and stressful issue that has become public and the husband remains in the background somewhere. Fathers do need to speak up whether a child has a disability or not.
For the most part, the responses have been favorable,however some of the comments are just as vicious as the original anonymous letter. I do understand disabilities for I have been an advocate for disabled children for the past thirty five years. But before my heartstrings are pulled in painful directions, some facts could be evaluated in a more productive manner.
Where did this come from? Forgive me if you said and I didn't see it. I'm concerned about this, and I want it verified. It is so extreme it could be a hoax, and we need to know if it is.
ReplyDeleteVery sad. It sickens me reading a letter like this the author of this letter obviously has some type of disability herself. Talking like that about an innocent child is beyond what a mother needs to hear she is dealing with enough taking care of her child and trying to give her child the best life that the child deserves. I myself had 1 child he is 9 and has autism. He is loud at times and screams, and makes lots if "noises" that arnt "normal" but thats just him full of life, and happiness and amazement Children with disabilities are pure gifts from god, special angels brought to live with amazing families that are able to give them good lives. The author of this letter is in humaine cruel and is of the devil. God forbid if she was to have a child with a disability. We would know the outcome of that. She would get rid if that child. What a sad, cruel, closed minded person she should be punished for the hurt pain and disrespect that she has thrown at that family. No one deserves that kind of treatment. I say that my son is my special angel or i call him my angel boy he is my autistic angel. People are cruel i have had my share of people telling me off because of things my son does the noises he makes and for crying. I had a man tell me to take my giant baby home and keep him there because he was crying in the store. Im not going to keep my son at home because hes "diffrent" from what people thinks is "normal" to tell the truth my son is normal hes normal as himself and i wouldnt try to change that ever and i dont allow people to try to make me change what we do to please them. That woman (if u can call her that) is seriously mental in her brain to have wrote that letter i hope the lady that received the letter was able to get help about it and that the author of the letter gets in trouble. I hope the lady and her child are okay after receiving such hate and that there copeing well with it but i hope that they dont move and that they fight for their rights this act is sickening so sorry hate was shown to you and your special angel god bless
ReplyDeleteTo the family of Christian....(by the way, he and I share a birthday!) What I would have done, had it been me...would to make tons of copies of this letter and especially "HAND DELIVER" TO ALL WITHIN A MILE RADIUS, at their homes, with a letter of my own, just like you had made, attached to it.. there is ONE IDIOT....within the neighborhood, that did this horrible thing to you and your family. Ignorance runs amuck in this world, and this "person, or 'thing" is no different. May God Bless you and your family. STAY STRONG!
ReplyDeletei am new to this blog and i have read the letter that woman left you I was brought up that God puts you on this earth for A reason not to be made fun of or critisized but to be loved and wanted you have a very precious son and Christian is very lucky to have a mom who loves him with no shame or guilt and one day a woman will be sent to him to love him marry him and have kids of his own my love and prayers are with you and your family please keep me posted on how he is doing thank you for your time and love for a child so precious,yours truely,amy
ReplyDeleteThis goes out to the person that wrote this letter, you say the neighbors don't have guts to say this to the mother, but yet your the pussy mother that cowering being a no name letter. You set here and degrade this mother's beautiful baby. he is nothing more than a miracle. you know it's a fact that this cod does have problems but that does NOT mean he is a retard! Also just to let you know that children with disabilities grow up to be the most successful. And the kids that are normal grow up to be prostitutes or dope heads. And never amount to anything! So why don't you put your own weird into play when your own kids grow up to be screw ups. And use their body parts for science. You degrade this little boy cause of his medical issues that was not his nor his parents fault! How would you like it if you was in an accident you had no control over, and people treated you or your precious kids this way? there is a difference between a coward and and someone isn't afraid to leave their name. So here it is. My name is Nathanule
ReplyDeleteThis is Nathanule again, just wanted to say don't let people get you down. You have a beautiful baby boy. Whenever times get hard look at him and think he is my beautiful miracle
ReplyDeleteThat is the most disgusting thing I have ever read. I am so saddened by that hate in that. I am sending them some peace and that they can find it. To you and that mother pure love is what I am sending! Xo
ReplyDeleteI am a proud mom of a special needs child. She fought cancer for eleven years(off and on) she needs a lot of help in school. She has a lot of nerve damage. She can hardly read at fourteen, but what I can say is SHES alive, happy, smiles even through her worst days and fears. She is my miracle. I'd rather have all the issues, then my little girl being gone. Shes not perfect but who is? Whomever wrote that is petty and weak minded. My child is special needs but she's special. She lives everyday in honor of Gods miracles. She's a walking talking piece of my whole world. Should I have put her in a home because she was to much work?? No way in Hades!! That's like telling them your to much work!! Who cares!! We as special needs parents do. Its a daily routine. Their normal just because their different she criticized his mommy? Its her child born of her body. God forgive her please. He's the only one to judge. As of right know and forever I'm one happy special needs mommy!! Keep rocking on.
ReplyDeletewow, shades of the 1950's... my grandmother took her granddaughter out shopping one day. She granddaughter had CP (she has since passed away) and some woman actually came up to her and told her she should keep that child home so people didn't have to look at her. I know my grandmother probably lambasted her. I don't know what was said as I was a child and it wouldn't have been appropriate for our ears. Because of my cousin I worked in an institution for the handicapped and I took "my" kids out when ever I could. I always had this, "I dare you to open your mouth" attitude. I wonder if that is why no one ever said a word to me. How sad this still happens.
ReplyDeleteThis woman is a sad excuse for a human being & shouldn't have the luxury of calling herself a mother!!! She says no one has guts to say anything but didn't sign her real name?!!! Seriously, if it takes guts to rip out the heart of another mother raising the child God has given to her then I would rather be a COWARD! This woman should be charged w/ SOMETHING!!! It angers me & brought me to tears just reading it! How dare she think it's ok to talk to someone like that?!
ReplyDeleteI had a baby that she would have called normal until doctors overdosed him on anesthesia & he became brain damaged, blind & deaf. So I guess according to her he wasn't normal anymore! He passed away when he was 20 months old but if not for that I would still take care of my son as every other mother in this world. Love him, teach him, & let him experience as much life as he could!!!
Shame on anyone for talking or treating people badly because they're not like you!
This would be my response:
ReplyDeleteSo your pissed off….
Because I have a child with disabilities? Because I have not murdered that child so that you may feel more comfortable? So that your ‘normal’ children will not be disturbed by sounds they judge to be abnormal? Because our family should dare live close to other ‘normal’ families? Because we dare to allow a child with disabilities out of the house when the sounds he makes are different from that which you are used to?
There have always been people like you. During the holocaust they despised Jews and were pissed off at anyone who stood up for them; They were disgusted by abolitionists and defended the right to make money with slave labor. They found homosexuals vile and unworthy of obtaining a livelihood or participating in a community. They consider Muslims, Buddist, Hindus and Zoroastrians morally inferior and unworthy of citizenship. Sometimes they attend church and consider themselves followers of Christ, but they forget to ask “What would Jesus do?” With every generation the stench of the hate, hypocrisy, and cruelty becomes more identifiable to the larger population. So much so that now, someone like you can’t even sign a letter that expresses your anger, because in spite of your rotting hateful soul, there is a tiny part of you that is capable of shame. There is a tiny part of you that doesn’t want to be associated with the person that wrote that letter. I really hope that tiny part of you doesn’t die. I hope it grows into a part of you that wouldn’t want to hurt a family like the one you wrote this letter to. I hope, some day, you realize the horror of what you wrote.
Your letter stated “You had a retarded kid. Deal with it.”
I have a disabled child. I am dealing with it. Your idea of properly dealing with it is that I murder him. You are the one that seems incapable of dealing with it.
I will not murder my child. I will not move. I will not forbid my child access to the outside world. To pressure me to do any of these things is a hate crime. Deal with it.
Dear Lacey,
ReplyDeleteI am beyond shocked at that coward, the only hoping and saving grace is I hope someone realizes who that sick woman is and calls children protective services and checks to make sure her children are indeed safe, to be raised by such a cold heartless woman, surely there is something wrong.
A lot of people have apologized for that sick woman, I refuse too. She is the disease that plagues our world. The righteous, the ones who think they deserve so much, to that I say I'm sorry.
Your are a kind loving mommy. I would love to have you and your beautiful son and family in my neighborhood.
Sending love and light to you and your family
<3
I posted this on my own facebook page when I shared it the first time but it bears repeating: The person who wrote this has more handicaps and challenges than a child with special needs. I would vote to have this person caged since they clearly can't act civil and could be a danger to society. I would truly be afraid to have my child play at this mother's house (and I use the term "mother" very loosely because no mother I've ever come across has a hatred this strong for a child). Horrible. ** PS Sunshine ~ next time sign your actual name, if these are your beliefs then stand behind them. *Coward*.
ReplyDeleteI wish I could reach out to the family who got this letter. They have rights and could have gotten some organizations involved in defending them or just went to the media. But since we have no way of knowing who the family is, I did share it on my facebook. I'm sure such vile hatred and lack of willingness to understand the needs of a child with special needs is more rampart than we as the American public like to think it is. I, for one, commend you for bringing this to people's attention. This woman's intent was to privately humiliate this family, we need to stand up to such indignities and make sure your family and other families are spared such circumstances.
ReplyDeleteThe person who wrote the disgusting letter above is so wrong.. How can she in her right mind write a mother such a hurtful letter regarding her child. The child is so cute. Yes his little eyes are blind with extra skin. He cannot be like other children but does this mean you hide hiim... Do away with him, or even have his organ parts removed to give to other children who need them.. How miserable this person must be to humilate this family.. This child is loved not only by the parents and other siblings if there are any, but also loved by God. What do you hate any child with a birth defect.. How bout a mole or a club foot. What about a port wine birthmart.. Just do away with the child cuz people like you are cruel enough to write a letter like you did.. So women wait all their fertile years for a child and would love to have a child, any child... This child is so darling and sweet... They parents love their child.. It takes a real parent to love a child like this...Not a horrible child, not a disgusting child, not even gross child, none of which this child is... This child is a beautiful gift from God. He allowed this child to this set of parents, because God knew this set of parents would love and cherish this sweet lil guy... I ask God to forgive you... I ask God to be with this parent and other parents of children with less than perfect bodies... God be with these parents... Love and Hugs for your lil guy...
ReplyDeleteHonestly why dont you go door to door publicly after getting the attention of your local news station in an effort to find & call out the author of this cowardly ignorant letter & ask her what kind of medical attention she is getting for her disabilities i.e. ignorance, feeble mindedness, cowardace, selfishness, low self-esteem, being an unfit parent, and being an all around cunt. If you'd tell me the neighborhood's location i'd do it myself and get a litteral petition WITH signatures calling for this woman to be commited to a mental hospital, to move out of your neighborhood or the best possible option and give her children to close family for adoption and kill herself. I'm sorry if i sound foul or wrong but our already sick society doesn't need nymore people like this poisioning the air we breathe much less poisoning the minds of her own "normal" children and corrupting them with such values as cowardace, ignorance & biggotry. I'm sorry but i have an autistic step-son who is such a bright boy and a joy to know and people like the author make me sick truly. Honestly if there was such a day as the purge as is portrayed in the movie i would hunt down the author & people like them & end their existence making the world a slightly better place. Im sorry you had to go through such discrimination and you are a verry brave & strong woman with a wonderful child. I hope for nothing but the best for you and your family - sincerely Zakary H.
ReplyDeleteWhat can I say...I suppose evil comes in all shapes and forms, not just the devil and his demons. It's actually sad really as this person probably thought they were nice, well liked "normal" people (as she so vehemently refers to herself and her children) but can't imagine what her poor children would grow to be like being raised by such a narrow minded hateful person. And in case she reads this, which I doubt as she will most likely be plagued by what she's done for the rest of her life, I've seen more handicapped and disabled people find love and live happy, fulfilled lives. She strikes me as someone who easily could have aborted her children had any of the scans shown the slightest imperfection. Rant over but still feel physically sick that another human being could stoop so low and in such a cowardly fashion - writing a letter for crying out loud and doesn't have the balls to face you in person????
ReplyDeleteThank you for sharing this letter. People can be cruel, but you are right - you answered your own question. I love following you and Christian's Achievements - And I love that you and your husband had such Faith to keep going even when the road was hard. I have had the blessing of working with awesome kids like Christian, as well as Adults who are "Delayed", and let me tell you - it's not them who are "handicapped" it's SOCIETY that is handicapped by people like this woman this who feel the need to take their insecurities out on everyone, and other people like her who just plain don't understand. God Bless you, and every Mom that has ever had to put up with cruel people like this. You are strong. God gives us what we can handle in life, and it's a blessing to have struggles, because it means we're strong enough to handle them. Thank you for being a lighthouse for other Moms! Bless you Lacey!
ReplyDeleteFor anyone looking for more information, this happened in a small Southern Ontario (Canada) town called Newcastle. Here is the local news report: http://www.citynews.ca/2013/08/18/family-in-shock-after-hate-letter-targets-teen-with-autism/
ReplyDeleteThank you for posting that Ryan. I hope this wicked person is caught.
DeleteBy some of the responses, it seems that several people
Deletethought that the letter was directed at Lacey. This clarification is helpful and the link provided give
us an opportunity to think things through.
This letter has been written many times over by the Hitler's of this world, the genocides that have taken place, the ethnic cleansings, by war dictators, by rapists, by domestic violence, by slavery, by those who bomb buildings, by those who gun-down children in schools, by third trimester abortions, by doctors who do experiments on people who are prisoners of war camps and prison facilities.
In general by those whose hearts have been darken by hatred, prejudices, by fear of what is unfamiliar, by out of control greed, by misuse of power and authority, by child abductions, by predators who roam the internet looking to spot an easy prey, and by murders who are featured every day in the newspapers, and also by those who bully teenagers into despair to the point of suicide for the shame they feel to make known their dishonor and rejection.
This is a good day when the hearts of people are given
a voice to present support to a family who value the
child they have.
I feel physically sick that someone could write something like that, they should be ashamed of themselves for even thinking that... I have normal children and I have shown my child not to judge anyone, get to know them and see them for themselves not by the colour of their skin, what they look like as everyone is an individual... I have an adopted brother who is special needs and my auntie that was a Downs who sadly passed before I got a chance to meet her... I can't remember what my life was like prior to my brother coming into my life but I was always shown compassion and love for all people no matter who they are.... I have taught my children the same morals I was given and I will never allow my children to be mean like that....
ReplyDeleteI hope and pray that whoever wrote that letter has a heart cause to me the words in that letter are from a cold hearted mother not a mother that has love in her heart...
As no true loving mother could even think that at all...
I take my hat off to mothers in your situation as I don't know how I would have coped but as a mother I'm sure I would have because the love of a mother and her child is so strong that it's them the children that keeps you being who you are, a loving mother for your son or daughter...
People that write or even think of something like that needs to reassess their lives and concentrate on themselves or get to know the family and have a heart it's not that people asked to have a handicapped child, it's just something that has happened... How do they know that the child that she is referring to didn't have an accident which made that child the way he or she is...
It angers me to think people can be so ignorant, we are dealt a set of cards and have to run with them through life and some cards we can work with and others we can't but when it comes to giving birth to a child....
I guess if someone said to this pissed off mother that they need to euthanize their kid they'd not like that... They need to get a life and sort out themselves before judging an innocent child who has more of a right to being on this earth than she does... If she had balls to write this then she should have had balls to either hand deliver or place her name on it for all to see... She is a COWARD that's all I can say and she needs to go where the sun doesn't shine... Sorry but I'm angry that someone could write something so vile and disgusting...
I know Lacy it wasn't directed at you but it's mothers like you that inspire other mothers we love you and Lacy and you're an amazing loving mother who I'd love to have part of my life and proud that I'm able to be a apart of your life via facebook and your profile page... You are a lovely person and any mother that has a child with any problems is an amazing person, the person that wrote this isn't... xxx
Even though that letter is beyond my amazement to think that someone would want to write such a cruel letter, I would not pay the letter any attention. The person who wrote it however, is clearly very sick indeed. How unfortunate for her family members, in fact anyone for that matter to be associated with 'IT'. That is not a normal action to be taking, she should be ashamed of herself.
ReplyDeletePut this letter behind you and let nature take it's course...have faith and leave karma to deal with the drama...God works in mysterious ways. Distract your focus from any negativity. Disgusting is all that she is!
It is very disturbing to know that there could possible be a person who lives in a neighborhood and is raising children of her own that could even remotely feel this way. It turns my stomach and I don't know what to say except I feel like everyone should pray for this person because she needs to be touched by god and his love. It is a difficult thing to do but that is the best way to handle someone so disgusting.
ReplyDeleteI saw this on Facebook and commented on Facebook before coming here. I'm John.
ReplyDeleteThis is the sad reality some people can't accept. No matter what kinds of problems we have or have with others, there will always be people who have such a lowlife view of the world. There will be those who have a lowlife view of others. That's why most YouTube commenters try to find every possible reason to dislike someone or go completely off-topic and into deeply damaging topic matters. I know this speaking as a YouTube veteran. As much as you want to believe there are intelligent and considerate people in the world, there will always be those jackasses among sheep. I'm sorry you had to experience this monkeyshine by this person. Maybe the one who directed these words towards you needs to move out and never come back.
johnbmarine.blogspot.com
What scares me is that this poor excuse for a human being, indicated that she is a "mother"! That means that she is instilling this hatred in her child/children. Because of the level of hatred spewed in this letter, she should take it to the nearest police station and take out a hate mail complaint, if, God forbid, something should happen to her child. The other thing that bothers me is that she thinks she is speaking for other people in the neighborhood. I don't believe for one minute that anyone else in the neighborhood feels like that. I'm sure that she will eventually find out who wrote that letter. God bless her and her child. As she can see, she has a lot of support from loving, compassionate people all over the world.
ReplyDeleteThis letter came across my newsfeed yesterday my brother is the one who posted it the original poster is a neighbor of the lady who received it it was actually the grandmother of 2 autistic boys whom she watches 2 days a week as a mother of a 4.5 year old with asd I was enraged to say the least I want to find this lady and bring my kid to her neighborhood and dare her to say something to me I would fully be prepared to get arrested by I would be beating this woman that's how angry I am over this letter...
ReplyDeleteI just read this hateful letter on a friend's Facebook page. I literally felt sick to my stomach. The so called mother that wrote the letter is a disgrace to the human race. You are a strong and lovely woman and your son is blessed to have you. I will keep you and your son in my prayers. God bless you both!
ReplyDeleteAmen. I whole heartedly agree with everything you wrote.
DeleteI am so sorry your family was attacked by such a vile "person". People can be so cruel and thoughtless but this letter is a special kind of mean. God "keeps it real" by placing special babies right where they are supposed to be-with the people who will love and care for them and give them the best possible life experiences. The parents, the whole family really, learns just how strong they are and what unconditional love really is. The rest of us should learn compassion, caring and sensitivity from the extraordinary ones. Unfortunately some people don't have the capacity for acceptance and are threatened by what they see as abnormal. The author of this letter is hateful and hurtful, rude, narrow minded, vile and despicable. I hope her own children learn to rise above her upbringing and be better people than she is. How dare she say such things to the family loving and caring for their child-a child of God-just like her "normal" children.
ReplyDeleteOMG. Who does the person who wrote this think she is?? That kid has just as much right to be outside in his yard as everyone else does in that stinking neighborhood. He is probably excited and why he is loud. Just like any little kid gets. We have loud kids here who are "normal"-- so called normal whatever that is these days. You should take that letter to your local courthouse and use it to gain a restraining against this woman and her family. The letter is abusive and discriminates and hints at future violence against you or your family. You will get the restraining order. See how much she stands behind her hateful letter in front a judge and upstanding citizens. My heart goes out to you and your family. Do get the restraining order now, do not wait for this get worse. Anyone who can right a letter like that has issues, deep ones.
ReplyDeleteI pray for people without understanding... Every person deserves the right to go out in their front yard and sing and play whether it is normal or an abnormal language. God Bless this mother who takes the time to go outside with her disabled child/adult they deserve to enjoy the sun too. I actually seem to enjoy people with special needs more than regular people. I go to the store and you can bet if there is someone with a special need they find me and we become fast friends. They give me joy that I just can explain. A real smile in my heart. So to all those who have had to endure such a horrid experience from a neighbor they aren't the majority. The majority of us love unconditionally and love special children just a little more.
ReplyDeleteThis is awful! The coward didn't even have enough guts to sign the letter. I hope karma bites this person in the rear nice and hard. I am with Apryl Nichole McDaniel - Call the police and file a formal complaint. Also file a formal complaint with the postal service assuming it came via snail mail. This has lawsuit written all over it. Slander against an innocent child. The judge could make the author do community service at a special needs school. I am repulsed.
ReplyDeleteI first glimpsed this letter on your Facebook page. My cousins in Canada have heard about it on the news. I know you have spoken with a media member there, too. History has always born witness to those who judge unfairly, speak out of turn, manifest hatred and foment just to watch the battles erupt. But, as you've set forth, there is balance in the world. When evil rears its ugly head, we have to do as you have done and call forth all that we know and believe to be in direct and powerful opposition to that evil. Goodness exists amongst the multitudes! My first thoughts regarding this letter revolved around some type of mental illness and a need for attention. Though our initial reaction might be to wish harm or payback on the person, it's clear that there is a need to educate and help this person once the the harassment has been dealt with. Especially if she does, indeed, have children. I hope that the media balances out this coverage with a great deal of positive stories which will shed light on autism and other children with special needs.
ReplyDeleteHow could anyone be so thoughtless and cruel. Having a baby with special needs could happen to any one of us and as a nurse ive seen many a condition and disability but one precious thing I have learned is to treat everyone as an equal and with dignity and respect. The person who wtote this obviously has problem's :-( very very sad and the poor mother that had to read this about her precious child my heart breaks for her. X
ReplyDeleteI just came across Christians story. You are an amazing mom! He is so handsome and so full of life just as any child should be at his age. Reading that letter the women sent you is utterly cruel. I feel sorry for that women as we all know karma comes back 3 folds. She is a heartless B***H that needs to move if she feels that way. She is the one that needs to move to the back woods with her messed up mind. I live in California and we have all walks of life and we are there for everyone no one is a burden. Now you have a party till 4 am on a week day I might have a problem but a child. Please. If I were you I'd take her to court for harassment!!! I wish you, your family and Christian all the best in the world. God will look over all of you. <3 Hugs & love from California!!
ReplyDeletewow have a heart lady what a shame you are to the world think of the love you give your kids and this mothers poor kids that have to live with this nut!!
ReplyDeleteIs this for real? I can't even believe somebody could speak like this. This woman should not be able to raise children. NOT AN OUNCE OF COMPASSION. Honestly some of the things she says in this. Never mind the fact that she is even thinking them, but what kind of person comes out and says these things, especially to the mother of the boy she is being so cruel about. She should be completely ashamed to even have these horrible feelings, not broadcasting them in letters with thousand of exclamation marks. And she considers herself "normal"? I'm pretty sure telling a mother that her child should be harvested for his "not retarded" body parts is NOT normal. I really hope you take legal action against this woman, simply for the fact that she would be raising her own children to act with such hatred to others and that really scares me. The way she talks makes it hard to believe she could even have children because you would think somebody who has been a mother would not be able to say such horrible things about someone else's child, but apparently that was way over her head. Any person with half a heart would offer help to a mother who sounds like she has her hands full, reach out to her, not write her a hateful letter. This is disgusting.
ReplyDeleteThis so called "mother" is clearly jealous her kids are normal and you have a special needs child and getting special attention that her kids don't. She definitely has some mental problems and I am guessing it's beyond anything to do with her "normal children". She definitely needs help. And giving her attention is exactly what she wanted. To be "special". Just remember: Her kids may be "normal" to her. But to another Mom, they could be far from it. I'd seriously not give her the time of day. I'd crumble up the piece of paper and just trash it. We all know who needs the help.
ReplyDeleteI'd teach this 'mother' how to spell, and then help her find psychiatric care.
ReplyDeleteFor Christian, I think he should use his appearance and intelligence and talents and abilities to the full possibility. People use 'how they are' all the time for what they can make with themselves, and he shouldn't be shy either.. :)
Wishes of health and happiness for the Buchanans.
if anyone should move away, it should be her. no one wants to live around a TRUE monster like that. I pray she repents and comes to here senses, then she can be forgiven. there is nothing wrong with your son, he is most beautiful and a joy to behold.
ReplyDeleteI am sorry you received this letter. Please do not let it hurt you. The devil is trying to bring you down. Everyone is born equal but some people face bigger challenges in life. Christian is loved and I am sure brought you happiness. The evil thing that wrote to you does not deserve your attention. Put that letter in the garbage!!! Smile because you and Christian know happiness and love.
ReplyDeleteHi Mrs. Lacey I am a 16 year old girl and I am doing a project on clift lip for my child development class and your story has inspired me. Please email me I would love to know more. My email is tayperry63@gmail.com
ReplyDeleteHave a blessed day OH PS: that note was hateful your son is beautiful and that women was just ignorant.